Today

Today I feel contrary to myself
I feel like eating apple pie for lunch
and french fries for dinner
Like listening to over-played Death Cab songs
and watching documentaries
instead of doing the dishes
Like leaving my bed unmade
and crumpled napkins on the floor of my car
Like staying inside when it's sunny out
and wishing it was overcast
Like giving into my introverted tendencies
and only talking to people I have preference for
I feel like being difficult
and lazy
and imprudent
And all of that feels good
Refreshing
Like dipping my foot into a cool lake on a sweltering day
Tomorrow I will come back out of it
Back to reality
Back to dishes
and salads
and standards
and expectations of myself
Back to being the best version of myself that I can muster (I really do try)
But today, no.
Today I will blatantly disregard my own best advice
and wallow in my self-combative state.